Funny Bed Jokes

How does Michael Jackson know its time for bed?


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President Obama says that he prays every night before bed


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When does John McCain usually go to bed?


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Why are blondes so easy to get into bed?


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What did the blanket say to the bed?


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What kind of bed does a mermaid sleep in?


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Why should you take a pencil to bed?


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What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?


Find more jokes in: Special Day Jokes

Why did the elf push his bed into the fireplace?


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What do you call a mummy eating in bed?


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Shall I tell you the joke about the bed?


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QUESTION: Why does the town idiot take his bedroom door off


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Scott finally got his girlfriend into bed


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Knock Knock Who’s there ! Bed ! Bed who?


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A little boy came downstairs crying late one night. ‘What’s wrong?


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What do tigers wear in bed?


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Mother: Fred, why did you put a slug in your grandma’s bed?


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Doctor, Doctor I dream there are monsters under my bed, what can I do?


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Chuck Norris’s bed is a tarp


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Night. A sleeping couple is lying in a bed


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Why did the woman take a load of hay to bed?


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When is your mind like a rumpled bed?


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Two friends who lived in the town were chatting


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Counselor: How many times did I tell you to make your bed?


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What should you do if you find a snake in your bed?


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Sam was on his death bed


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Your mama so fat that when she wanted a water bed


Find more jokes in: Yo momma Jokes

I don’t think my Mom knows much about children. Why do you say that?


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How do you know when there is a snowman in your bed?


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When Mr. Maxwell’s wife left him he couldn’t sleep. ‘She took the bed!’


Find more jokes in: Men and Women Jokes

A woman and her lover are on the bed


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Why did the bed spread?


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Why do people go to bed?


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If you put 30 female Apes and 30 male Apes in a bedroom, what do you have?


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Yo mama so short she does backflips under the bed.


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What animals do you bring to bed?


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What should you do if you find a witch in your bed?


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When does a bed grow longer?


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Why did the composer spend all his time in bed?


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You can’t have any more chocolates tonight


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Why did the man take a pencil to bed?


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My head fell off and rolled away


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What is the softest bed for a baby to sleep on?


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A neighbour bumped into Jenny playing outside her house


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I’d love you to stay the night, but I can’t


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Why did your sister keep running around her bed?


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Yo mamma is so fat, her husband has to stand up in bed


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I love the lines men use to get us into bed


Find more jokes in: Dirty Jokes

How do you know when there’s a rabbit in your bed?


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Doctor, doctor, I keep having strange dreams


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