Question: How does a blonde prefer her eggs? Answer: Unfertilized.
Question: How does a blonde like her eggs? Answer: Unfertilized.
Question: What kind of egg did the bad chicken lay? Answer: A deviled egg!
Question: What did the chicken say when it laid a square egg? A. ”Ouch!”
Question: Why do hens lay eggs? A. Because if they dropped them they’d break!
Question: How do ghosts like their eggs? A. Terror-fried.
Question: What did the pitcher say when eggs, bacon and pancakes were playing baseball? A. ”Butter up.”
Why didn’t the female frog lay eggs ?Because her husband spawned her affections !
Did you hear about the lady whose house was infested with Easter eggs?She had to call an eggs-terminator!
What do you call the outside of a hand gren-egg ?The bombshell !
When somebody yells
How do frogs manage to lay so many eggs ?They sit eggsaminations !
When toasting the holidays, Republicans ask for eggnog or mulled wine. Democrats ask for a ”Bud.”
How does a witch make scrambled eggs?She holds the pan and gets two friends to make the stove shake with fright.
Waiter: These are the best eggs we’ve had for years. Diner: Well, bring me some you haven’t had around for that long.
Customer: Do you have bacon and eggs on the menu: Waiter: No, we clean our menus regularly.
Diner: What’s wrong with these eggs I ordered?Waiter: Don’t ask me. I only laid the table.
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn ?An eggroll !
Q: Which of the following doesn’t belong: wife, meat, eggs, blow job? A: The blow job. You can beat your wife, your eggs, or your meat? but you just can’t beat a blow job.
What do you call an egg from outer space?An unidentified flying omelet!
Why is an egg like a young horse?Because it can’t be used until it’s broken!
Did you hear about the egg laden rabbit who jumps off bridges?He’s the Easter Bungee!
Teacher: If I lay one egg here and another there, how many eggs will there be?Fred: None! Fred (surprised): Why not?Fred: Because you can’t lay eggs!
Did you hear about the witch who turned her friend into an egg?She kept trying to poach her ideas.
Why do we paint Easter eggs?Because it’s easier than trying to wallpaper them!
Could you kill a monster just by throwing eggs at him?Of course – he’d be eggs-terminated.
Why is the Liberty Bell like a dropped Easter egg?Because they’re both cracked!
When Chuck Norris was denied an Egg McMuffin at McDonald’s because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a Wendy’s.
What happens when you drop a hand gren-egg ?It eggs-plodes !
At a party, a conjurer was producing egg after egg from a little boy’s ear. ”There!” he said proudly. ”I bet your Mum can’t produce eggs without hens, can she?” ”Oh yes, she can,” said the boy. ”She keeps ducks.”
What happens if you play tabletennis with a bad egg?First it goes ping, then it goes pong.
My parrot lays square eggs but can only say one word. What’s that?Ouch!
Q: Why do hens lay eggs? A: If they dropped them, they’d break
What kind of bird lays electric eggs ?A battery hen !
Where do you get frogs eggs ?At the spawn shop !
What did the egg say to the boiling water?”It might take me a while to get hard I just got layed last night.”
Why didn’t the pigs eat the rotten eggs in their feed trough?They were saving the best for last.
Would you like a duck egg for supper?Only if you quack it for me.
How does the Easter Bunny paint all of those eggs?He hires Santa’s elves during the off-season.