First girl: I spend hours in front of the mirror admiring my beauty. Do you think that’s vanity?Second girl: No, it’s imagination.
What’s the speed limit of sex?68? at 69 you have to turn around.
Do you know what a mice said when it saw a bat?Mom ! I see an angel.
My Mother uses lemon juice for her complexion. Maybe that is why she always looks so sour.
I’m not ugly. I could marry anyone I pleased! But that’s the problem – you don’t please anyone.
Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks?
Yo Momma is so ugly that she scares blind people!!!!
She’s so ugly that when a wasp stings her it shuts its eyes.
Fred: What’s that terribly ugly thing on your shoulders?Harry: Help! What is it?Fred: Your head!
Why are cigarettes sold at gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?