Taylor swift: so he calls me up and he’s all like ‘I still love you’ and I’m like, Wait, is this Connor, Patrick, Joe, Luca, Taylor, John, Cory, Toby, Jake, Garret, Eddie, or Harry?
Question: What do you call friends who love math? Answer: algebros
Question: If you love a Redhead, set her free … Answer: If she follows you everywhere you go, pitches a tent in your front lawn and puts your new girlfriend in the hospital, she’s yours.
Q. Why do men like love at first site?A. It saves them a lot of time.
Why did the little piglet fall in love with the hog?Because he was such a sloppy dresser.
How do we know burgers love young people?They’re pro-teen!
A husband and wife love to golf together, but neither of them are playing like they want to, so they decide to take private lessons.The husband has his lesson first. After the pro sees his swing, he says, ”No, no, no,” you’re gripping the club way too hard!” ”Well, what should I do?” asks the … Read more
FredA: Boys whisper they love me. Fred: Well, they wouldn’t admit it out loud, would they?
Do you believe in love at first sight or do I have to walk by again?
Husband: What do you love most, my natural beauty or my body?Wife: Your sense of humor.
How do we know that hamburgers love classic music?They’re often found at the Meatropolitan Opera House and Cownegie Hall!
A fellow was very much in love with a beautiful girl. One day she told him that the next day was her birthday. He told her he would send her a bouquet of roses… one for each year of her life. That evening he called the local florist and ordered twenty-one roses with instructions that … Read more
What famous painting do cows love to look at?The Moona Lisa!
What would you get if you crossed a monster with the god of love?A stupid Cupid!
Who do hamburgers love on TV?Archie Bunker’s son-in-law, the meathead!
Which burgers love to act?Ham-burgers!
Why don’t bunnies make noise when they make love?Because they have cotton balls.
Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill.
‘Do you love me more than you love sleep?” ”I can’t answer now. It’s time for my nap!”
Q: Why does everyone love cats?– A: They’re purr-fect!
Q. Why is the book ”Women Who Love Too Much” a disappointment for many men?A. No phone numbers.
What do you call two birds in love?Tweethearts!
Q: Why did the blonde make love in the microwave? A: She wanted to have a baby in 9 minutes.
If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?The swallow.
What happened when the monster kissed his one true love?He left lip prints on the mirror!
Why do Apes love to go to school in bad neighbourhoods?They like any jungle – even a blackboard jungle!
Which author do the Gorillas love most?Joh Steinbeck – who wrote ‘The Apes of Wrath!’
Chuck Norris’s love for humankind heats up the planet by 2.35 degrees annually – a phenomenon also known as the Global Warming.
I’d love you to stay the night, but I’m afraid you’ll have to make your own bed. Oh, that’s all right, I don’t mind at all. Right. Here’s a hammer, a saw, and some nails. The wood’s in the garage. I have four legs, but only one foot. What am I?A bed
I love the lines men use to get us into bed. ”Please, I’ll only put it in for a minute.” What am I, a microwave?
Why did the kangaroo love the little Australian bear?Because the bear had many fine koala-ties!
My sister fell in love at second sight. When she first met him she didn’t know how rich he was.
Turtle to turtle: ”Don’t ya just love the sound of rain on your roof?”
Who sings ”Love me tender”, and makes Christmas toys?Santa’s little Elvis.
What’s a cow’s favourite love song?When I fall in love , it will be for heifer.
What kind of music do phones love to hear?A symphony
If love is blind, why is Lingerie so popular?
People who love sausage and respect the law should never watch either being made.
My boyfriend thinks I’m beautiful Well they do say that love is blind !
What does it mean to come home to a man who’ll give you some love and tenderness?You’re in the wrong house.
Fred: I’d love to be an actress. Harry: Break a leg then! Amy: Whatever for?Fred: Then you’d be in a cast for weeks.
I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, ”Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?” She said, ”No, I hate myself now.”
Wife: ”Why don’t you ever callout my name when we’re making love?” ! Husband: ”Because I don’t want to wake you.”
What happened when a man fell in love with a grand piano?He said, ”Darling, you’ve got lovely teeth.”
Who does a ghoul fall in love with?His ghoul friend.
Who is a vampire likely to fall in love with ?The girl necks door.
Whats the definition of love, true love, and showing off?Spitting, swallowing and gargling.
They’re perfectly matched. He’s blinded by love and her looks are out of sight !
Why do pigs love Halloween?There’s lots of hogsgobblin.
What happens when two burgers fall in love?They live together in holy meatrimony!