They say close to 60 million people may have watched the debate
They say close to 60 million people may have watched the debate. In fact, the only person who didn’t tune in was President Obama. What happened? –Jay Leno
They say close to 60 million people may have watched the debate. In fact, the only person who didn’t tune in was President Obama. What happened? –Jay Leno
Question: Mary’s mum had three children. One was called April, the second was May. What was the name of the last one? A. Mary!
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
May I buy half a rabbit?No, we don’t split hares!
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really, really big guy named Chuck.
There was once a puppy called May who loved to pick quarrels with animals who were bigger than she was. One day she argued with a lion. The next day was the first of June. Why ?Because that was the end of May!
Regardless of what you may hear, there’s still many women these days who are excellent ”housekeepers”. Seems each time they get a divorce, they keep the house.
Diner: May I please have a glass of water?Waiter: Why, are you thirsty?Diner: No, I want to see if my neck leaks.
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but a Chuck Norris glare will liquefy your kidneys.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name you can’t remember).
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.
William: May I have some money for the man crying outside ?Mum: What crying man ?William: The one that’s crying, ‘Ice cream! Ice Cream !’
It only rains twice a year in Seattle: August through April and May through July.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.
‘May I take your order?” the waiter asked. ”Yes, how do you prepare your chickens?” ”Nothing special sir,” he replied. ”We just tell them straight out that they’re going to die.”
May: What position does your brother play in the school football team ?Jay: I think he’s one of the drawbacks !
Tech Support: ”How may I help you today, sir?” Customer: ”Hello…hey, er…I think I’ve got the wrong software installed in my computer.” Tech Support: ”Why is that, sir?” Customer: ”I bought this minitower system from you, and it came loaded with software called the ‘XYZ Desktop’.” Tech Support: ”Yes…?” Customer: ”Shouldn’t it be called the … Read more