Blonde Jokes

Question: Did you hear about the blonde who stayed up all night to see where the sun went? Answer: It finally dawned on her!

Question: How did the blonde break her leg raking leaves? Answer: She fell out of the tree.

Question: How did the BLONDE die ice fishing? Answer: She was run over by the zambonis machine.

Question: How do you change a blonde’s mind? A1: Blow in her ear. A2: Buy her another beer.

Question: How do you get a blonde off of her knees? Answer: Come.

Question: How can you tell if a blonde has a vibrator? Answer: By the chipped tooth. Question: Why are only 2% of blondes touch typists? A. The other 98% are huntin’ peckers

Question: How do you get a blonde on the roof? Answer: Tell her drinks are on the house.

Question: How do you get a BLONDE to marry you? Answer: Tell her she’s pregnant.

Question: How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree? Answer: Wave to her.

Question: How can you tell if a blonde is being unfaithful? Answer: Everybody in the neighborhood is going to the pharmacy for penicillin.

Question: How does a blonde part their hair? A1: (Action of scissoring legs apart) A2: By doing the splits.

Question: How do you get a twinkle in a Blonde’s eye? Answer: Shine a flashlight in her ear.

Question: How do you make a blonde’s eyes light up? Answer: Shine a flashlight in their ear.

Question: How do you get a blonde to marry you? Answer: Tell her she’s pregnant. A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, ”I slept with a Brazilian….” The blonde replies, ”Oh my God! You slut! How many is a brazilian?”

Question: How does a blonde give a high-five? Answer: She smacks herself in the forehead.

Question: How do you measure a blonde’s intelligence? Answer: Stick a tire pressure gauge in her ear!

Question: How do you tell if a blonde did your landscaping? Answer: The bushes are darker than the rest of the yard.

Question: What do you call 4 blondes lying on the ground? Answer: An air mattress.

Question: What do you call a blonde between two brunettes? Answer: A mental block.

Question: What do you call a blonde with pigtails? Answer: A blowjob with handlebars Question: Why did the blonde shoot the clock? A. To Kill time

Question: What do you call a room full of blonde women, half with PMS, half with yeast infections? Answer: A whine and cheese party!

Question: What do you call 10 blondes standing ear to ear? Answer: A wind tunnel.

Question: What did the blonde say when she knocked over the priceless Ming vase? Answer: ”It’s OK Daddy, I’m not hurt.”

Question: What does a blonde say when you blow in their ear? Answer: ”Thanks for the refill!”

Question: What does a blonde think an innuendo is? Answer: An Italian suppository.

Question: What does a blonde say if you blow in her ear? Answer: ”Thanks for the refill!”