A seal walks into a bar and asks the bartender
A seal walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender asks the seal, ”What’s your pleasure?” The seal replies, ”Anything but Canadian Club.”
Bartender Jokes
The local bar was so sure that its bartender is the sronger
The local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing $1000 bet. The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the lemon to a patron. Anyone who could squeeze one more drop of juice out would win the … Read more
The social worker asked the bartender: What’s the difference
The social worker asked the bartender ”What’s the difference between your job and mine?” The bartender replied: ”I only had to go to bartender school for 6 weeks and I learned to mix a very good drinks, than wait a couple of hours to have people tell me their innermost thoughts while you went to … Read more
BARTENDER: I think you’ve had enough drink sir
BARTENDER: I think you’ve had enough, sir. DRUNK: I just lost my wife, buddy! BARTENDER: Well, it must be hard losing a wife…. DRUNK: It was almost impossible!
What did the bartender say to the jumper cables when they walked into the bar?
Q: What did the bartender say to the jumper cables when they walked into the bar? A: Ok you 2, dont start anything
A man walks into a bar and says to Bartender
A man walks into a bar and says, ”Bartender, give me two shots.” Bartender says, ”You want them both now or one at a time?” The guy says,” Oh, I want them both now. One’s for me and one’s for this little guy here,” and he pulls a tiny three inch man out of his … Read more
The bartender asks him What’ll you have?
The bartender asks him ”What’ll you have?”. The guy answers, ”A scotch, please”. The bartender hands him the drink, and says ”That’ll be five dollars”, to which he replies ”What are you talking about?I don’t owe you anything for this”. A lawyer, sitting nearby and overhearing the conversation, then says to the bartender, ”You know, … Read more
The bartender asks the guy sitting at the bar, ‘What’ll you have?
The bartender asks the guy sitting at the bar, ”What’ll you have?” The guy answers, ”A scotch, please.” The bartender hands him the drink, and says ”That’ll be five dollars,” to which the guy replies, ”What are you talking about?I don’t owe you anything for this.” A lawyer, sitting nearby and overhearing the conversation, then … Read more
A fish walks into a bar, the bartender asks, ‘What would you like?
A fish walks into a bar, the bartender asks, ”What would you like?” the fish says holding his neck, ”Water”.